(I am a few months into my first “real” job. My marriage recently ended, and I am feeling very unhappy. Some but not all of my coworkers know that I am getting divorced. My birthday is coming up shortly, and I decide to throw a party to cheer myself up. What birthday party is complete without cake? So, I make a phone call.)
Me: “Hi. I’d like to order a birthday cake, please. It needs to be big enough to feed 25 to 30 people.”
Bakery Employee: “No problem. What would you like it to say?”
Me: “‘Happy Birthday, [My Name].’”
(I hang up the phone and realize that two of my coworkers are staring at me.)
Coworker #1: *smirking* You’re ordering yourself a birthday cake? That’s the saddest thing I’ve ever heard.
Me: “Well, I want a cake for my party. You’re all invited, by the way.”
Coworker #1: “Can’t someone else order it for you? What about your husband?”
Coworker #2: *nudges [Coworker #1]*
Coworker #1: “What?”
Coworker #2: “She’s getting divorced, idiot.” *to me* “I’ll come to your party. Can I bring anything?”
Me: “Just yourself.” *smiles gratefully*
(The party ended up being a huge success. The cake was delicious! By the time everyone had left, it was 1:30 am and my house was a mess. Oh, did I say everyone had left? Not quite. [Coworker #2] stayed behind to help me clean up. And – to paraphrase a famous saying – several years later, Reader, I married him.)