(I’m folding laundry.)

Me: “Hey, this would make a great Halloween bra!”

Girlfriend: “Huh? Because it’s black?”

Me: “Well, yeah, but it’s also got this cool spiderweb design.” *gestures to the sides of the bra*

Girlfriend: “Oh… that’s not a spiderweb design.”

Me: “Huh?”

Girlfriend: “That’s just what happens when I’m too lazy to use a delicates bag… It used to be lace.”