We blitzed the city streets. My heart beat at my chest. My pupils dilated and my breath was sharp. I was alive. Even beneath the suppressive canopy of New York City’s sky rises, I felt a giant next to these concrete gods.

One of the Bulldozer’s thugs flung himself into the alleyway in front of us. He held – A KNIFE. We stayed our pace. Channel 2.5 News’s helicopter flew above with a spotlight on us. Showtime. We closed the gap and –

“Kablam!” I yelled as Hero Man punched the thug across the face. The strike was stunning. Perfect torso rotation. Legs planted to the ground for leverage. I felt as though my words carried that same power. As if the expression helped my mentor fight evil. We were close to the exit of the alleyway.

We had just infiltrated Bulldozer’s factory. He’d been planning on curating a fleet large enough to, you guessed it, bulldoze the entirety of New York City. He’d been at it for six months. By the time we got there, he had an entire THREE bulldozers ready to go; almost enough to bulldoze the entirety of New York City. Here’s how it went down.

“Gadget Boy, wrench!” He yelled.

Action time. I threw my arm into my tool bag like I had when i dropped my wallet through a drain basin. Night vision monocle, no. Anti-gravity doohickey, no. Third pocket to the right. “Blam!” I said as I threw the wrench across the room, somewhat off kilter. Hero Man caught it and disassembled the bulldozers in one fell swoop. We took to the streets.

At the end of the alleyway, three more henchmen gathered. I looked to Hero Man.

“Gadget Boy, we’re outnumbered. Stand aside and get ready.”

I dashed away like a rat in a subway. Hero Man stood tall like a pillar of leadership and strength. I found myself imitating him; it made me feel stronger. His cape flew behind him. The gold of it reflected off the white suit tailor made for him.

The first of the henchman had a KNIFE and swung it at Hero Man. The strike landed with a loud WHACK and CRACK. The henchman smiled for a moment before he realized the crack was the sound of his knife cracking.

“Try again!” I yelled as Hero Man upper cut him and threw him backwards in to the alley from which we came. He landed unconscious not too far from me.

The two remaining thugs attacked at the same time. They were certainly about to land their blows.

“Hero Man, lookout,” I said as the first strike arced through the air. It seemed to have paid off, as Hero Man caught the thugs swinging arm and used his other hand to punch the other thug.

It looked as though all threats were neutralized. It was time for my signature catch phrase. I stepped closer. The thug who was lying next to me regained his consciousness and reached out. I felt a searing cold pinch on my calf and yelled.

Hero Man dropped the other thug and flew to me, my eyes were blurring. With a swift kick, the thug was thrown away.

“Gadget Boy, you’ve been stabbed,” Hero Man said as if he himself were going to faint.

I bled profusely. It was as good a time as any for my signature catchphrase.

“Boolean,” Boo-Lee-In. I said as I fainted.

I woke up on a stretcher. My head was in a daze and later a panic as I shot up to make sure the coast was clear. My eyes darted around for Hero Man as two paramedics approached. I must’ve slept through the adrenaline rush as I felt a throbbing pain in my leg.

“Stay still, Gadget Boy. We don’t know if you’ve sustained any more injuries,” One of the paramedics said. I recognized this one. He usually worked the late shift on Saturdays.

I spotted Hero Man down the street where there was a lot of commotion. I wasn’t surprised. The defeat of Bulldozer’s warehouse was an accomplishment the NYPD had been striving towards for months. The leveling of New York City weighed on everyone’s minds to the point that people were starting to go crazy. Riots, protests, and other violent acts.

It was only right that he would be the spotlight in the revelry. The occasion certainly called for celebration. With Bulldozer’s bulldozers out of the picture, we could finally move on to expanding the reach of our heroism. We had the idea to expand in to allowing superhero apprenticeships who would work their way up to the top. And if there was anything I knew, it’s that they’d have a very long climb.

“No worries, gents. I can stitch myself up no problem. Thank you for the bed. I was only stabbed. I don’t need any further examinations.” I jumped down from the stretcher and looked over to Hero Man once more. This was his day. His plan. His execution and I got to be there to help get it done.

A part of me wanted to sprint over next to him. I could imagine the proud smile on his face as he’d make way for me to be asked some questions by the anchor in the field. I decided I would head home instead. Tend to the wound and make sure I got into bed before my parents noticed I was gone. I had some leeway, though. I’d gone days without being home without a word. Arriving at ten at night was no sweat.

I climbed through my window and smacked my head on the way through. I cursed under my breath as I quickly disrobed and put on temporary clothes. Unnoticed, I made my way to the bathroom and took a shower. If my parents were asleep, a shower wouldn’t disturb them. I had rerouted the plumbing so that it no longer ran by their room, but instead, ran between the dining room and living room.

I went to my room and popped my TV on. I knew the broadcast from earlier was live, but I always recorded them. I found it and pressed play.

There were action shots of Hero Man punching villains and flying around the city. All the while the news anchor was singing his praises as they usually do. As he deserves. He’s the greatest hero this city has. After a night like this, he deserved the praise he got. I must’ve got carried away in my thoughts as I accidentally drove the sewing needle into my calf. I winced but kept going.

My attention snapped to the TV when the interview started. I saw Hero Man standing as he usually does. The ambulance lights did a really good job setting the visual tone of the interview. I felt a little bit of blood running from the wound.

“Wow, Hero Man. Looks like you’ve had quite the evening.” The news lady was blushing. I found myself smiling as well.

“We took quite a beating, but fear not, New York, Bulldozer’s fleet is destroyed,” Hero Man said.

Damn right he is. My attention shifted back to my leg. This was my favorite part of any mission. Being able to see the effect of the actions we took. They impact we made.

“With the spike of heroism we’ve seen over the last couple years, we’re seeing a correlating number of newcomers to the superhero world. There are a lot of new sidekicks out there. Have you noticed any standouts?”

I know the current best sidekick out there. I thought to myself.

“I’ve heard The Prowler has inspired fear in the ruffians of these streets. There are more, but I’d say he’s the standout.”

I thought he was going to talk about me, but I suppose I’m not an up-and-coming sidekick, I’ve been in the game for three years now.

“Have you considered signing any of these new sidekicks on, to help in eradicating this city from criminal activity?”

There was a pause. Is she insinuating that I would be replaced? Why would she be saying that? I thought. I felt a sudden pounding in my chest.

“No, Gadget Boy -” I felt my attention dissolve as cotton candy would in water. Does she think I’m not a good sidekick? If she thinks that, do other people think that as well? I remembered how my hands were trembling as I threw the wrench to Hero Man. I remember how I was specifically asked to stay behind when the danger showed up. I remember how, even as I stood away from danger, I still managed to get hurt.

I felt dizzy as the broadcast muffled through the speakers. Were my catchphrases corny, my banter useless? Did I even need to warn Hero Man?

I drifted away through school like an early morning fog. I didn’t catch many details. This was somewhat normal. Leading a nocturnal life as a hero – or sidekick, rather, led to varying degrees of sleep deprivation.

It wasn’t the sleep that distracted me. A million thoughts shot through my brain as I walked the halls. I felt foolish. I was prancing around as if I were the greatest sidekick ever. When, in reality, people were talking about my possible replacements.

I hadn’t checked in with Hero Man as I usually would have in the morning. He would usually send me a dispatch mid-way through the day, but none arrived. I felt like I should remind him, but thought that if I needed to remind him, it wasn’t that important to begin with. I suddenly felt as though he was only including me, not because of my utility, but because of some sort of charity.

“Boolean,” I muttered under my breath, letting out a weak laugh. “Give me a break.”

The evening arrived with no dispatch still. I’d spent the entire day in what felt like a daze. Colors were drained. Music was dull. Life seemed to be empty. It pissed me off.

Everything seemed to be going fine until that stupid broadcast. The people were doubting me and my solution was to feel bad for myself? No, I didn’t think so. I got to thinking, we only destroyed Bulldozer’s supply, but we hadn’t actually captured him. It wouldn’t take him longer than six more months to acquire three more bulldozers. The time to act was in that moment, so I suited up.

Tracking him down wasn’t hard. He’d left a path of destruction in the wake of his fleet’s destruction. Scrapes against the pavement. It took time to be able to track them through the traffic. The locals were helpful enough to help me when I got lost. I couldn’t help but think that any one of them could’ve wanted me replaced. I was determined to show them that I am capable and that I am the greatest sidekick, or even a good hero.

Pushing inside the location I believed Bulldozer was, I equipped my tactical stealth shoe covers and strode down the hallway. It was a very non-descript office building. I could hear slamming and yelling down a hallway. Bulldozer was much easier to find than I had originally thought. In a state of anger, he was sure to be unaware of his surroundings. The doubt I’d felt about being a good sidekick had vanished. I had this in the bag, and the world would see it soon.

The door was open. It had been slammed into the wall so hard that it cratered the drywall. The door was disfigured by splintering fractures. Henchmen stood around the room, five of them. Standing like a monolith between them was Bulldozer. A tall man, black of hair, face with the topology of a plate.

The plan was to cut the power and see how they reacted. Depending on how many men he sent out, I’d have to create more diversions, but in a way that wouldn’t make them suspicious. Then, I would goad Bulldozer to attack me in the dark, where an ensnaring trap would be waiting for him.

The ceiling was paneled, so there was ease of access. I made my way to the floor’s kitchen and found a breaker. A switch labelled east-wing was my quarry, and I flipped it. The lights went out. I promptly shut the others off once I memorized the path to the ceiling.

Bulldozer shouted out orders and I heard a larger amount of footsteps than I was expecting running down the hallway. Certainly he didn’t send everyone out, I thought.

I shimmied my way up to the ceiling and crawled to the room Bulldozer was in. He’d sent everyone but himself out, I could tell. I equipped my night vision monocle. Bulldozer sat on a moving crate in the middle of the room with his face in his hands. He was alone.

I dropped into the room. “Booyah.” I said and immediately regretted. That was a sidekick thing and that day, I was the hero.

I could see Bulldozer, but he couldn’t see me. He heard me and he turned in my direction, slow and unprovoking.

“What?” He asked.

“You’re done for Bulldozer. I’ve got the drop on you and you’re under arrest.” I puffed my chest even though he couldn’t see me.

I heard a sniffle. “Who are you, kid?” His voice was like gravel and stone.

“I am Gadget Man.” I held my posture and started to feel a little off. He wasn’t reacting how I thought he would. I expected a fight, but he was just calmly talking to me. I needed to scare him.

“Like, Gadget Boy, but a man?” He sounded genuine in his question.

“Well, I was Gadget Boy, but now I’m Gadget Man.” I dropped my heroic stance. It was Hero Man’s stance, not mine.

“You sound more like a boy.”

Is he mocking me? I thought Bulldozer was a muscle head who charged at all his problems without thinking. Did he call my bluff? “This isn’t about me. Your days of crime are over. Your choice, we can make this easy.”

After a brief pause, he said, “Fine.”

“What?” I asked. He’s giving up? If he did that, then the news articles would say he turned himself in. No, I needed to best him in combat. I needed the articles to say I did it.

“You gave me the choice, I choose the easy way.”

“But – what about the bulldozers? The warehouses? The destruction?”

“You trying to talk me into it again? I made my decisions. I thought I loved bulldozers. But, bulldozers don’t love me.”

I cracked a green glowstick and tossed it on the ground between us. “It’s been one day since the incident. You don’t think you’ll eventually want to bulldoze again?”

“You want me to fight back. Is that it? So, you can have Hero Man come in here and turn the tide? That’d make for a good story.”

“Hero Man isn’t here,” I said and regretted it immediately.

He turned fully to look at me. “Are you crazy?”

“Are you? Attack me and watch what happens.” I assumed a fighting stance I’d seen Hero Man do.

Bulldozer didn’t move. “I’ll make it look like you won the fight kid, but there’s no way you’d beat me. Go ahead and land a couple strikes and deploy one of your gadgets and let’s get it over with.”

I didn’t want that at all. I wanted a real fight, with real stakes. I didn’t want to get handed becoming a hero. “No.” I dropped the fighting stance.

“Then, why are you here, kid?”

I suddenly didn’t know. I wanted to come here and put away a criminal. As I fell further in, the sillier I felt. The Bulldozer that I knew was a criminal with a focused path, a concrete goal. Bulldoze New York City. Around every corner, every step, someone was telling him not to, and he did it anyway. What I was looking at was a man who had lost. Not only his warehouse and a whopping three bulldozers, but also himself. All because the people around him told him no.

And then, I couldn’t become a hero. Not even if I wanted to. All from things that I couldn’t quite comprehend.