We’ve recently been having issues with our garage door, as it will often start to close, make a weird noise, and then open back up. One day, I drop my husband off to pick up his car after getting a minor issue fixed, and since he has to go in and get his keys, I beat him home. Once home, I phone him and ask if I should just leave the garage door open, since he will be home soon.

Husband: “No! There are valuables in there!”

Fair enough; we do have a bike, camping equipment, and several tools in there, so I close it.

Not too long later, he gets home and comes through the door.

Husband: *Complaining* “Why did you lock the front door?”

Me: “There are valuables in here!”

Husband: “But you’re in here!”

I just stood there with my mouth open. It took him a while to realize what he’d said.