My girlfriend has a job on our college campus. This year, gnats have been a major issue in our area, and her bosses ended up buying several glue traps to try and cull them in the building she works in.

It’s important to note that I’m generally fascinated by bugs to the point that my girlfriend literally calls me “Bug” as a pet name. However, I am not an entomology student and have never done anything with dead bugs to prompt this text conversation in the wake of her sending me a picture of one of the traps doing its job.

Me: “Honestly, I need to get me some of those.”

Girlfriend: “Do you want me to sneak you the paper?”

Me: “Is there even an easy way to get it to my apartment? Without it sticking to everything?”

Girlfriend: “I can carry it?”

Me: “That still feels like more trouble than it’s worth even if I swing my car around. I can just make a [Supermarket] pit stop this week.”

Girlfriend: “Oh, you mean the paper.”

Me: “???”

Girlfriend: “I thought you meant you wanted the gnats, not the paper.”

Me: “[Girlfriend], darling, love of my life… I know I like bugs, but what on EARTH would I do with a bunch of gnats stuck in a glue trap?!”

Girlfriend: “I don’t know! I stopped questioning you and your bugs ages ago.”

At least she’s supportive of my weird interests?