I met a guy back at the end of college. We were on our first date when someone walked by with a golden retriever. The dog sniffed us as he passed, his tail wagging like crazy.

Me: “What a happy boy.”

Date: “Dogs are stupid.”

Me: “Sorry, what?”

Date: “Pets. Like, what is the point?”

Me: “Companionship, affection, someone to come home to? A therapist that won’t judge you?”

Date: *Shaking his head* “That’s what a wife is for.”

Me: “So… no pets in your future, then.”

Date: “Absolutely not.”

Me: “Oh. Okay, well… I don’t think we will have another date after this, so—”

Date: *Stunned* “What?”

Me: “Did you want to finish the meal, or I can just give you cash now? I’ll pay for everything so you aren’t out any money.”

Date: “Over f****** dogs?!”

Me: “Is there anything that would change your mind?”

Date: “No. Would you give up having pets?”

Me: “No. Look, I don’t want to disrespect you by continuing something with no future. I love pets and I will always have them, so—”

Date: “You’re serious.”

I put down enough money to cover both of our meals, plus a tip.

Me: “Thank you for your time. Good luck with dating.”

[Date] spent weeks texting me, noting all the reasons it was better to not have pets. Bullet dodged!