My German girlfriend and I have visited her family in Germany, and we are now at the airport to fly back to London. We’re looking at some German chocolates to bring back as gifts, and there are multiple flavours, mostly chocolate and nut varieties.

Me: “Hey, so, German for ‘hazelnut’ is ‘Haselnuss’?”

Girlfriend: “Yes.”

Me: “And the German word for ‘cashew nut’ is ‘Cashewnuss’?”

Girlfriend: “Yes.”

Hmm. I start rustling around for other flavours.

Girlfriend: “You’re looking for peanuts, aren’t you?”

Me: “…Maybe.”

Girlfriend: “The German word for ‘peanut’ is ‘Erdnuss’.”

Me: “Oh, come on, Germany! The joke was right there!”

Girlfriend: “You were going to have fun with that one, weren’t you?”

Me: “For weeks! Months, even! I was going to offer everyone ‘pea-nuss chocolate’, but as usual, Germany proves that it has no sense of humour!”