I’m single and not particularly interested in a new relationship, but my friend tells me about a friend he thinks I should meet since we have a lot in common. 

I agree to meet the guy for a coffee, and we immediately hit it off, spending all afternoon discussing our various nerdy interests. We end up going on a few dates, and I enjoy his company, so after a few weeks of seeing each other, I decide to invite him over to my place.

He comes over, we start to get down to business, and then he asks to use the bathroom. I show him where it is, and when he comes out, he’s wide-eyed and looking very spooked.

Guy: “Wow, you really shouldn’t have all that nasty stuff out in the open like that.”

Me: “What nasty stuff?”

Guy: “You know, the… the… stuff.”

Okay, now I get it. I keep my stash of pads and tampons on a shelf in the bathroom where it’s easy to reach and see, both for my own comfort and for guests in need of supplies.

Me: “Oh, okay. First of all, those are not nasty, and they’re on the shelf so anyone who visits can just grab what they need if they need it.”

Guy: “Why would anyone need that when they’re visiting?”

Me: “Because they might be on their period? It’s something that happens to a lot of people. Besides, my thirteen-year-old niece comes by with her friends a lot, and I don’t want them to have to ask for a tampon.”

Guy: “What? You’re encouraging them to be slutty! If they’re only thirteen, they shouldn’t even be having periods!”

Me: “Do you know how puberty works? That’s when most girls get their period!”

Guy: “No, it doesn’t start until you’ve had sex for the first time!”

Me: “What on earth gave you that idea?”

Guy: “That’s how it works! You have to poke a hole for the blood to come out! Everyone knows that!”

I spend a few moments trying to make sense of that before I decide that it’s not an argument worth having.

Me: “Okay. I think it’s time for you to leave.”

Guy: “Why? I thought we were going to have a good time tonight!”

Me: “Because someone with that poor of an understanding of female anatomy should under no circumstances be given access to it.”

He did leave, thankfully.

When I told my matchmaker friend about it, he was just as flabbergasted as I was. The subject had apparently never come up when they were talking to each other. Neither of us could figure out where this guy had gotten his “facts” from. This was an adult man in his mid-twenties, and we have sex-ed in Sweden.

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